So after that last long post I decided I desperately needed to see the death certificate. I needed that tangible proof she’d taken her life, and I needed to see when. Was it the day her body was found? Or had she laid there, decomposing, for days until someone noticed?
Well according to the official paperwork (which cost nearly $80) she died on July 23, from a self administered overdose.
They included the drugs she took, one of which she’d used in a previous attempt and another considered an “antiquated” drug for anxiety…antiquated because of it’s likelihood of addiction and other issues. It’s replaced by benzodiazepines, which are highly dang and addictive in their own right, so you can imagine the issues of this particular drug.
In two days there’s going to be a picnic, one that I host, in her memory. I doubt if anyone who knew her will actually show up. I know her brother is coming, maybe some old family friends, and of course my friends (because they love me or some such ).
The day after I got the certificate I started getting these INTENSE pains in my ear, pains I couldn’t shake off or valsalva maneuver my way out of. Turned out it’s an ear infection, but the antibiotics made me too sick to function so here we are.
Preparing for a picnic with sharp standby ear pains that come & go. Let’s just hope for the best, right?
Resiliently Ridiculous 